Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Sept 14 & 15, 2010

I am trying/hanging on to faith that things always have a reason and when I think of that, I know bad things happen and it messes with me and being able to move forward without severe anxiety.

Yesterday was a day filled with pain. I spent the day playing a computer game (water bugs) and Sudoku (paper version).

Today I slept most of the day or tried to because I had a migraine. Around 4ish I finally got up and took a migraine pill. I don't know what caused it. But I always get skittish when I get one and try to not do anything to cause it to come back.

4 days till Leaving here. I am trying to make myself make the most of it for my friend and I but..I..can't..seem..to..let..go. Here's hoping that tomorrow is a day of going to the beach. My friend deserves that at least. She asked me today if I was sleeping so much to avoid her. That hurt. I swear, every one takes my damn Autism as a direct assault on THEM.

Be back in a bit maybe. I always get sick to my stomach when writing about hurtful/stressful stuff. xoxo, Kandi Ann

Monday, September 13, 2010

Monday September 13, 2010

Good evening. I woke up at 11 am and took my med's (non narcotic, a gift from a nice person who lives in the building) and energy drink and got a few things moved where they belong around here. The maid service came and the lady saw my Service Dog Taylor and went into shock, right before my eyes. She was holding the wall and her chest at the same time. I was able to talk her into letting me have the Vacuum and I got the room done. They don't do a good job anyways so I was glad I was able to.

I have been helping my friend learn how to work Sudoku puzzles by doing them and whiting out a few spaces per box. She is really getting the hang of them. And I still spent a large part of the day working the puzzles myself. I also went to the 1st floor and got ice. Some days I can barely bring myself to get it at all. Today I will declare a pretty good day, I even got Taylor some brushing in, which she isn't fond of but is doing better standing still instead of sitting when I try to brush her. Taylor also got to see her little 1 1/2 yr old friend Lauren who lives next door to us and was out in the front hall. Taylor has her own set of friends that know her by name and visit with her on the balcony. I am very happy she has friends of her own and sad we only have 6 days in a known location to us. Though we have only been here 3 wks. I also can't wait to leave because the people here (the 2 men that run the place only) are RUDE.

Oh, I also called the place that works on my car trying to get reimbursed for the damage to my car and the tow fee which was not supposed to be added. I freak out over being on the phone though so getting the call in was a big success. I also called and tried to have my medical plan changed. I didn't get through, left a message and will call again tomorrow if I have as good a day as today. I did run out of energy before Taylor's mid afternoon walk so my friend did that one. She usually takes the first and second walk because at those times I am barely able to walk myself. Its a sad day when drug dealers can get drugs but I can't get the med's I have been on for years and actually need.

I don't know that I will remember to update everyday though I want to. I do know that I have a lot of random/racing thoughts that I sometimes want to get down on paper/computer and I am thinking I wanted to make 2 separate posts for those blog posts but maybe I will mix them. I can't decide yet. Well, my friend just went to get me an order of fries for dinner so I am going to try to get a quick shower in before she gets back.

6 days till no idea where I will be living. On my income I will be honestly lucky I have a car to sleep in. God is good and I trust that which ever way life takes me will be his will. At least I will do my very best humanly possible to actually listen to what God's will in my life is. I like to take the lead and its led me badly before. This place is a major example. I FELT like God was telling me not to stay here and ignored it and ended up in the worse place (yet wonderful too, yes that is possible!) ever. xoxo, Kandi Ann

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Sunday Sept 12, 2010 (Stuff Done)

So far Today, I woke up to the door being opened by my friend so Taylor could go sit on the balcony. I actually told her to do this. I grouched at her to shut the door. I woke up feeling like hell. I really need to learn to filter my "outer grouch". I don't mean to be like that.

Then I fell back to sleep and her phone made a loud beeping noise that scared me so bad that I couldn't get back to sleep. I have spent most of the day so far in bed working Sudoku puzzles. This is my new (again) favorite past time since the pain breakthrough's are keeping me down.

I really want to start blogging daily. Mostly so I have something to print up so my Mom can learn who I really am. But also for me to be able to look back on and also hopefully make a few friends.

I took a 5 hour energy drink and had enough energy to straighten up my dresser and get some sketch stuff out so Linda could work on her art. I am amazed at what she has drawn so far. If I remember I will get a picture of it up later. And that was all the energy I had so back in bed I am. xoxo,