I took full night med dose last night. 1 flexeril, 1 singulair, 2 xanax.
After that..
I spent a long while brushing Taylor. Who btw sheds worse then a long hair dog. Her fur is every where. I have her on good quality of food. She gets good treats and so on. And still sheds. Wish I could figure out how to have her shed less, but I digress. a lot. actually more often then not. :oP Then I took her out back and played ball with her for a while.
I tried to put order to my house since that is the only thing I have control of. I knew I would hurt badly this morning. After the hurt my daughter put me through and the fear I feel for her and my grandson, I had to put distance between us. I can't live through this again.
I usually have to (what I call) reboot my memory in the morning. I will wake up with no memory of anything. I have to look around, (Usually induces major panic attack), and try to remember where/what et. This morning I woke up and I didn't have to "reboot". I just remembered and didn't have my usual panic attack. The only thing I can think of is all that work/stuff I did last night. I don't have any energy left so I will see if I can get some before bed and try again. If I don't come back and update that means the reboot didn't get me back to where I am right now. Fully aware. *fingers crossed*
Very interesting day today is. I feel ok. better then usual. Though hurting which is just life. I feel better able to deal.
posted by Kandi Ann @ 11:17 AM
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