Learning to enjoy life

I have some weird pains going around my abdomen to my back. Shoulder pain new too. I think its the couch and how I am sitting so will change that and see.
This post is about my internet. I went through a few weeks of feeling like I had no right to have it with things being so tight and struggling so hard. So I just left the internet funds sitting in the bank. I am not big on late bills or not paying but I couldn't make a decision. So I didn't do anything figuring for once I would just get shut down and it would be out of my hands (though totally my choice, figure that way of thinking, I can't) so today, with the urgency of finding help and this being my only way of communicating I went to pay it and found two mos bill instead of shut of notice. So I paid past due and was relieved to have that back up. That is pretty cool. If I was unable to pay it I would have had time to pay it. I didn't know they did that with something so not needed as internet. I am thinking now if this was a business or something it would be necc. but I just use it for fun and now reaching out again, this time for bigger things. I started this blog a while back to find a nurse I think or to just have a connection with the outside world. I never realized I would be begging for help and that my well being and life would depend on it. So now the internet is necc for me. So I paid it. Don't worry, I would have paid it the minute it was shut off and told them not to restart it. I don't talk well on the phone at all so I figured that was safest to keeping me from anxiety.

I took my morning pain meds again today. I really need to find a happy medium. My Doctor told me that my vitamins could have caused the mind numbing can't get out of bed much less see for three days straight each week, Migraines, so I cut them totally as advised and added them back one at a time. When the headache came back I dumped the glucosamene in the garbage. I haven't had a headache that was crippling since last wks and I am 3 days over due for it. So maybe it was the vitamins. I also thought maybe I got a nut allergy as my soothy food is cashews. Everytime I felt a headache come on all I wanted was cashews. Well, with the vitamins out of the mix, I have eaten a few cashews got a tiny headache but not like before so it may have just been the nerves over eating them. I will try again when I am happy and not nervous and then if I get even a tiny headache I will say good bye to my love of the cashew. I do have to try again of course.

I am also pleased to announce that I asked my twitter friends to Pray for a lady I read online. I wanted to call her a friend then but I didn't want to be misleading as she didn't know me I just was a reader, champion Prayer person in her corner but this woman Michele proved that she is my friend also. I love her family as they are so wonderful, loving, God loving, God fearing people and I am so honored and touched she reached out to me in the middle of all she is going through. No one can have too many people who Pray for them so if your a Prayer person, baby lover or want to read someone so true and honest and heartfelt please drop by my new friends blog and say Hi and Pray for her beautiful new double blessings, Bobby & Maya. http://mylifeafterloss.blogspot.com/

xoxo, Kandi Ann

Labels: allergies, friends, internet, phoneaphobia

posted by Kandi Ann @ 11:04 AM